Sunday, November 27, 2011

He'll never know.

There's this girl. Oh sure she is beautiful, there are so many guys running after her, craving for her attention. But she is dazed and she can look nowhere else as long as he is in sight. Her face lights up every time he talks to her, her smile touches her eyes when he tries being funny, her heart beats without any rhythm, her eyes sparkle as she adores the guy who has all her attention. Every time they have a conversation, she acts calm and composed, even though there's a storm raging within. Every morning when her eyes open, she reaches for the phone to check if he messaged, if he hasn't, she looks at his picture and smiles; that gives her day a good start. Every night before she falls into deep slumber, she rewinds through her day and realizes that most of the thoughts she has had, are of him. And then she wonders, does he know? 

Of course not. She realizes that she is just another friend to him or another pretty face trying to win him over. She is just a face in the crowd, in his life, unlike how he has the spotlight in hers. 

Maybe its just a crush and maybe she'll stop feeling the way that she does now. Maybe he isn't the one. 
But these thoughts don't stop her. The more she tries to make herself understand and accept the reality, the more she finds herself being in love with him. Because when he holds her hand, she feels like she belongs somewhere and when he hugs her, she wants it to last forever because the only thing in the world that scares her is that she'll never feel that safe again. Just his company makes the world look so sane. Oh how she can listen to him talk all day. 
But once in a while, she finds herself losing control. She hates all the other girls he is all so nice to. For once, she wants what she knows she deserves. She wants to be the girl who changes his life, the one who is the best thing that has ever happened to him. But he cannot be blamed for not treating her the way she should be, he doesn't even know. And will he ever know?
Will her subtle hints help him put together the pieces of the puzzle together? Or will he always be oblivious to everything? 
Maybe she should let him know. But she won't. She's scared of the reaction she might get. She doesn't want the mystery to resolve either. She doesn't want to know the other half of the story yet. Because right now, there's still a slight chance that he might actually feel the same way and whenever this thought crosses her mind, she finds herself happy.. for a while atleast. 

What he means to her cannot be explained, neither will it be ever shown. 
So he'll never know, he'll never know what he has been missing on. 
Is she disappointed? No. She is happy in the little getaway world that she has created, and even though there's a 'maybe' here and there, there's still hope, shining upon her from everywhere. :)

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